Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
On this Roundup: Flight, Defiant Ogre, Séance, and Rain of Gore !
“So according to Galileo, this zebra should fall out of the plane at the same speed as this bowling ball.”
“Uh, are you sure that’s how it works?”
“Probably not. To be honest, I’m just tired of spending 500 bucks a month on zebra food.”
“I have no clam, but I still have porpoise.” –Defiant Orca
“Spirit, if you are in our presence, give us a sign by licking the back of my head once.”
When it appeared to rain blood, the residents of Ravnica shrugged it off as just another inconvenience of city life. It wasn’t until they realized they were actually being pelted with revolting Hawaiian Punch that they began to panic.
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*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff