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Peculiar Flavor Roundup – Ridiculously Photogenic Progenitus

Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!

Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.

On this Roundup: Progenitus, Pacifism, Extract, and Shapeshifter!

 

ProgenitusProgenitus:

“I can’t believe you’ve been taken in by this hoax. It’s the same as that Loch Ness ‘Monster’ photo, which was just a log in the water. This time, it’s five logs… five, 7,000-foot-long logs floating in the sky.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pacifism

Pacifism:

“I can understand dropping the sword in the name of peace, but he probably wouldn’t have frozen to death if he had just kept some of his armor on.”

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Extract

Extract:

“To be fair, I only told him I was 100% confident we could remove the brain tumor. I never claimed he would survive the procedure.”


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Shapeshifter

Shapeshifter:

As he lay on his deathbed, his entire life flashed before his eyes: That time he got in a sword fight, that time he got in a sword fight while apprenticing for the Blue Man Group, and that time he went trick-or-treating as Darth Vader.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!

*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff

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