Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
On this Roundup: Brion Stoutarm, Living Airship, Sliver Queen, and Femeref Healer!
After testing positive for illegal beard-growth hormones, Brion was stripped of the gold medal he won for the Goblin Put at the ‘86 Knollridge Olympics.
An optional fourth crew member acts as morale officer, cheering up the others by getting blind drunk, dancing jigs, and occasionally puking off the side of the ship.
Since the recent constitutional reforms, she no longer has any official duties, but gets invited to a lot of ribbon-cutting ceremonies what with her built-in scissorhands.
“… also, wisdom is my helm, courage is my shoelaces, patience is my all-in-one shampoo-conditioner, and stick-to-itiveness is my… hello? Guys, are you still listening?” -Asmira, Holy Rambler
Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!
*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff