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Peculiar Flavor Roundup – Plot Twist: Elspeth Was Dead the Whole Time

Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!

Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.

On this Roundup: Exiled Doomsayer, Defense Grid, Lim-Dûl the Necromancer, and Lifted by Clouds!


Exiled Doomsayer:

In truth, the only “doom” he witnessed in this future was M. Night Shyamalan continuing to make movies.










Defense Grid:

Much like the sci-fi technology upon which it was based, the outpost’s shields would hold as long as it remained powered by a fully-functional Plot Device.










Lim-Dûl the Necromancer:

The first order Lim-Dûl gave to his initial batch of undead minions: Slay Kjeldor Prep’s yearbook planning committee for voting him “Sharpest Cheekbones.”










Lifted by Clouds:

“Strangely enough, nothing about the six-legged, six-eyed, blue, ram monster seemed odd to me until it began drifting into the air on a cloud. That’s when I realized the drugs had probably kicked in.”









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*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff

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