Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
As a quick note, in addition to the URL above, Peculiar Flavor can now be found at FlavorText.LOL. It goes to the exact same site, I just thought it’d be fun to have a dedicated domain name.
On this Roundup: Thousand-Year Elixir, Saprazzan Breaker, Deny Reality, and Encrust!
“Good news, I’ve developed an elixir that will extend your life by a thousand years. Uh, one catch: It does take one thousand years to reach full potency, so… I hope you’ve got that kind of time to wait around.”
“Hey there, kids. Sorry to interrupt, but your parents hired me to spy on you two during your little beach date and break up the mood in case things got a little too ‘hands-y.’”
Plekmak would be forced to cast a Deny Reality spell on himself whenever he glanced at his checking account balance.
“… Fortunately, its first defense is a fleet of nuclear attack subs, so it doesn’t usually come down to that.” –Hephild, merfolk defense contractor
Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!
*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff