Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
On this Roundup: Rain of Blades, Gibbering Descent, Witchbane Orb, and Stave Off!
“Let’s see those climate change deniers try to explain this one.” –Al Gore
Just half way to his goal, Klorky bitterly regretted his decision to go for this particular world record. Why anyone even cared how many escargot he could fit in his mouth was anybody’s guess.
“Yes, I’d like to return this for a refund, please. Your sales guy assured me it’d keep my patio bug-free, but lately the only thing it’s been zapping is eldritch spirits.”
Garkshra claimed the pole dancing class was just for the exercise. Of course, it’d also be nice to have a skill to fall back on in case the liberal arts degree didn’t pay off.
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*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff