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Peculiar Flavor Roundup – Highfalutin Flatulence

Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!

Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.

As a quick aside this week, I just want to thank everyone who made it possible for Peculiar Flavor to reach 1,000 posts on Tumblr. Here’s to the next 1,000!

On this Roundup: Lightning Elemental, False Demise, Moonlight Geist, and Volcanic Eruption!


Lightning ElementalLightning Elemental:

“A crash of thunder, a breaking of wind,
He passes his gas with a wink and a grin.”
–Not William Knox, “Fartality”











False Demise

False Demise:

Plargon’s ruse would soon be coming to fruition; the hot lifeguard would be giving him mouth-to-mouth any minute now.










Moonlight Geist

Moonlight Geist:

As a new ghost, she was still getting the hang of the whole flying thing, having already run into several laundry clotheslines on the way to her destination.










Volcanic Eruption

Volcanic Eruption:

To Frodo’s dismay, he found that Sauron had had the foresight to build a decoy Mount Doom for just such a situation.











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*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff

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