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Peculiar Flavor Roundup – The Dog Voice Precedent

Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!

Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.

As a quick note, in addition to the URL above, Peculiar Flavor can now be found at FlavorText.LOL. It goes to the exact same site, I just thought it’d be fun to have a dedicated domain name.

On this Roundup: Thraben Purebloods, Chartooth Cougar, Glacial Wall, and Rise from the Grave!

 

Thraben PurebloodsThraben Purebloods:

“… also, I only feel comfortable pooping when they’re pooping. Oh, and, I sometimes hear the dogs’ voices in my head. In conclusion, no, your honor, I don’t believe I pose a danger to myself or the public.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chartooth Cougar

Chartooth Cougar:

Cougar hunting season begins the first weekend in June. It ends when the last cougar hunter’s remains have been returned to their family.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Glacial Wall

Glacial Wall:

“Okay, bad news first. You’ve built the wall on a sand dune, so the enemy can pretty much just dig underneath it with their hands. The good news, they probably won’t bother since the damn thing’s going to melt in a few hours anyway.”

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rise from the Grave

Rise from the Grave:

“Aiming necromantic spells is harder than it looks. You know it took me a dozen tries to resurrect the dragon and not one of the millions of dead bacteria in its intestines?” –Liliana Vess

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!

*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff

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