Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
On this Roundup: Sylvan Hierophant, All Is Dust, and THREE bonus Dragons of Tarkir spoilers!
She knows every single butterfly in the forest by name. Or, so she claims: A suspiciously high percentage of butterflies apparently go by “Steve.”
“Not by the hair on my chinny-chin-chin,” said the pig from inside the brick house.
“If you say so,” said Ulamog as he huffed, and puffed, and devoured the pig’s entire plane of existence.
“Please note that the emergency exits can be found on the left side of the cabin. Thank very much for choosing Skywise Air. Flight attendants, please prepare for enlightenment.”
The bell was sounded whenever the bladesmith needed to begin forging a new sword, not an uncommon occurrence considering Zurgo was always thrashing his against a heavy, metal bell all the damn time.
Despite assurances of competitor safety and years of lobbying, Ojutai failed to get the 100-meter snow dive introduced as a sanctioned event at the X Games.
Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!
*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff