Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
On this Roundup: Dismantle, Port Inspector, Stone-Throwing Devils, and Iron Star!
“Dis’ mantle? I don’t knows nothing about no mantle, alls I know, I gots hired to blow up dis’ machine.”
“Sir, these tariffs on foreign swimwear are incredibly important. Without them, thousands of domestic fashion designers would be out of work. Make sure you remember that next time you snicker at a Federal Bikini Inspector.”
“Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad we’re up against these guys and not the knife-chucking fiends. I just wish once in a while we’d get the ball-of-crumpled-up-paper-tossing demons.”
Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!
*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff