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Peculiar Flavor Roundup – Change of Plans

Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!

Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.

As a quick note, in addition to the URL above, Peculiar Flavor can now be found at FlavorText.LOL. It goes to the exact same site, I just thought it’d be fun to have a dedicated domain name.

On this Roundup: Elvish Lyrist, Scroll Rack, Soul Exchange, and Grizzly Bears!

 

Elvish LyristElvish Lyrist:

Bring me some food, I’ll cook it for you.
Bring me the pot, I’m making a stew.
Uh, bring me the recipe, I may have misread…
… Yeah, bring me my coat, we’re going out instead.


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Scroll Rack

Scroll Rack:

She had never seen anything like it: dozens of already-completed scripts for the rebooting of beloved science-fiction franchises. “You’ve seen too much, Hanna,” said J.J. Abrams, from behind her. “I’m afraid I cannot allow you to leave, now.”

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Soul Exchange

Soul Exchange:

ALL SOULS FINAL! NO REFUNDS, RETURNS, OR EXCHANGES!

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Grizzly Bears

Grizzly Bears:

Without many other options available in the forest, the training montage in the grizzly bears’ version of Rocky is just three solid minutes of knocking down various trees.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!

*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff

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