Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
As a quick note, in addition to the URL above, Peculiar Flavor can now be found at FlavorText.LOL. It goes to the exact same site, I just thought it’d be fun to have a dedicated domain name.
On this Roundup: Elvish Lyrist, Scroll Rack, Soul Exchange, and Grizzly Bears!
Bring me some food, I’ll cook it for you.
Bring me the pot, I’m making a stew.
Uh, bring me the recipe, I may have misread…
… Yeah, bring me my coat, we’re going out instead.
She had never seen anything like it: dozens of already-completed scripts for the rebooting of beloved science-fiction franchises. “You’ve seen too much, Hanna,” said J.J. Abrams, from behind her. “I’m afraid I cannot allow you to leave, now.”
ALL SOULS FINAL! NO REFUNDS, RETURNS, OR EXCHANGES!
Without many other options available in the forest, the training montage in the grizzly bears’ version of Rocky is just three solid minutes of knocking down various trees.
Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!
*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff