Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
On this Roundup: Veteran Bodyguard, Mirror Golem, Second Sight, and Centaur Rootcaster!
“Yes, I always go shirtless when on assignment. Assassins sometimes find the sight of my pecs distracting.”
“Send the mirror golems in the first wave. Even if the enemy destroys them all, the decades of bad luck they accrue should swing the battle in our favor.”
“What good is second sight to me? I need twelve monitors just to keep up with a tenth of my Twitch subscriptions.”
“Don’t worry. You know, with a little tactical thinking, even the dumbest superpowers can be used to one’s advantage. So, what can you do?”
“I can transform people’s hair into roots.”
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*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff