Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!
Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.
On this Roundup: Kresh the Bloodbraided, Fool’s Demise, Thundercloud Shaman, and Vampire Nighthawk!
He also got three practice braids done by his little sister, Gish the Bloodbraider, who’s starting cosmetology school next month.
Over the phone, Xarbun had requested a “plain old Swedish” massage, but for some reason, the receptionist at the spa heard him ask for a “celestial brain tentacle” session. Pretty understandable mistake.
… That said, he does get annoyed by the convoy of time-traveling DeLoreans that seem to follow him for some reason.
“For God’s sake, Tyler, get down from there. I’m sorry, but it doesn’t matter how many times you repeat ‘I am the night,’ to yourself, you’re never going to be Batman.”
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*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff