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Peculiar Flavor Roundup – Very Alternative Medicine

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Welcome to the Peculiar Flavor Roundup!

Every day at Peculiar Flavor, we bring you rejected flavor text from some of your “favorite” Magic cards. Whether it’s a visual joke, an absurd one-liner, or a response to the real flavor text, it’s guaranteed to make you laugh.* Each Monday on the Roundup, you’ll get to see a few of last week’s, ah… best entries.

On this Roundup: Experiment Kraj, Sun Droplet, Sunken Ruins, and Academy Rector!

 

Experiment Kraj:

“To fight cancer cells, most doctors attempt to use tiny weapons, like radiation or chemicals. We have chosen the opposite approach: Grow the cancer until it can be killed with readily available weapons, like swords and crossbows.” -Sobeer, incompetent Simic biomancer

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sun Droplet:

“Yes, Gwendola, I do think it would be crass to wear a necklace emanating the profound brilliance of the entire sun to your sister’s wedding.”

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunken Ruins:

“ ‘Sunken ruins’? No, no, no, I’d say it’s more of a ‘coast-adjacent, historic residence.’ ” -Kaz Blart, real estate agent

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Academy Rector:

“It says here you’ve missed class ten times this semester. That could jeopardize your graduation… [lets down hair, takes off glasses] now, what do you say we make those absences… disappear? [cue sexy synthesizer music]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is there a card you’d like to see infused with a Peculiar Flavor? Request it!

*Guarantee only applies to smart, good-looking people that are cool and good at stuff

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