Greetings my children, and welcome to our first horoscope reading. Ordinarily, the motions of the sun, moon, and planets through the constellations would influence your destiny, and we would read these motions and inform you of upcoming events in your life. This is virtually impossible now, as all of you on the different planes of existence have different suns, moons, planets, and constellations.
Through painstaking research and the cooperation of various enlightened planeswalkers, we have discovered that the motions of the planes through the Blind Eternities can also be used to forecast in a similar way. The mathematics involved are much more intense, but the portents that can be gleaned are much more specific because of this.
Studying the Blind Eternities has revealed new multiversal signs whose readings apply across all the planes. At first, we were only aware of 12 signs, a number related to a naturally occuring pattern in the signs of every plane. But in an odd twist of fate, the Eternities have revealed that a 13th sign does exist. Due to an extremely odd geometric happenstance, this 13th sign (Ophidian) only applies to those born on two dates.